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I can't remember much of those halloween yrs anymore, but I do remember once going as a Smurf (SHUT THE FUCK UP) and Dracula. I believe the costume looked something like THIS. Even as a 6 yr old I remember that cheap-ass plastic medallion and thinking this was not the way to strike fear into the hearts of people handing out candy.. Keep in mind this was back when vampires were still to be feared and not emo sparkly creeps that apparently spend more time crying then sucking blood. I mean did any of you see Dracula in MONSTER SQUAD? That was some scary shit right there.

ANYWAYS, as a 6 and a half yr old I was usually spent my days watching some PBS kids shows and making ants fight spiders in my mom's tupperware containers. But one tv show scared the ever loving shit out of me unlike anything has before...ah yes, good ol' TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE.

I don't know how a show can make a running brook and a covered bridge in broad daylight so absolutely TERRIFYING, but it somehow did. Even now this show's intro creeps me the hell out.

Here's the episode that made me afraid to sleep for 3 months straight. Of course it's dated, yet somewhat still effective:

Also, here's that damn kid from Explorers eating his oatmeal though his shitty halloween mask. This scene bothers me so much, he's been burned into my memory for over 20 yrs.

Updated: 10/24/09 7:34 PM Log in to comment! | Share this!

The People Have Spoken

66 Comments

Oct. 24, 2009 | 7:31 PM ApocalypseFish says:

rofl. first

Oct. 24, 2009 | 7:33 PM 1337Ratez2k9 says:

SECOND! ZOMGBBQ! Love your works mate :P.

Oct. 24, 2009 | 7:54 PM ZagmenO says:

I'll check it out soon.

Oct. 24, 2009 | 8:38 PM RedHarvest says:

ooooh yeah i remember this.....im going ta get hammerd.

Oct. 24, 2009 | 9:13 PM ninjaman9000 says:

Smurf??

Oct. 24, 2009 | 9:40 PM JohnnyUtah responds:

I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP RIGHT I WAS LIKE 3 SHUT UP

Oct. 24, 2009 | 9:25 PM WoodenSneakers says:

Darkside? Try DarkPLACE!!!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNfQ0O RwSDM

Oct. 24, 2009 | 9:56 PM flashwarrior says:

OK ill watch them videah and get back to you smurfy eh i mean drac- JEFF

Oct. 24, 2009 | 10:00 PM Toon-Ninja says:

A smurf!!!
lol i could see a little utah smurf running around with a pencil drawing while every 3 seconds was yelling "cockjoke"
I'd pay to see that

Oct. 24, 2009 | 10:20 PM flashwarrior says:

That video had a nice twist at the end, like my di- no nevermind that's not even

Oct. 24, 2009 | 10:30 PM LDAF says:

Tales of the Dark Side is the color version of Twilight Zone, only not as good. Start watching Twilight Zone instead, you won't be dissapointed.

Oct. 24, 2009 | 10:33 PM JohnnyUtah responds:

it's nice to see a 14 yr old that even knows what the twilight zone is..

I've seen every since episode...many multiple times, but thanks for the recommendation.

Oct. 24, 2009 | 10:42 PM Atgod88 says:

Smurf eh? I got a worse one, at about 5 and I was Woody from Toy Story.

Oct. 24, 2009 | 11:10 PM omegared says:

Good times Utah!!! Thanks for the glimps into your nostalgia. Hey wanna make some beautiful memories with me by a moonlit lake and getting sucked up by alien space ships??? I can arrange it. ANything for you my sweet ;)

Oct. 25, 2009 | 12:25 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

oh god im blushing

Oct. 25, 2009 | 12:13 AM Flee says:

I grew up with Are You Afraid of the Dark? I'd say not as creepy as older stuff but still fun to watch.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 12:28 AM fluffkomix says:

mustve been a smurfin time

Oct. 25, 2009 | 1:31 AM FunnyStuff707 says:

It's alright, I'm here for you if you ever get scared.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 1:43 AM doctormorgus says:

wait! how can you dress up like a smurf? did you paint your self blue and run around the town nude? or did you wear those "cool hip white pants"? rofl..but im an "emo sparkly creep" that was very offensive,,oh well :)

Oct. 25, 2009 | 6:24 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

i think it was just a smurf mask and white overalls...sorry you can put that boner away sir.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 1:52 AM FGIJonC says:

I've seen Monster Squad and it rocks. I miss the days when vampires were scary and not whiny and afraid to suck blood.

People should read Anne Rice more or something.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 7:44 AM Lagamuffin says:

Ahaha, a Smurf.
CLASSIC.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 7:46 AM bocodamondo says:

how about you?
you dont made a halloween flash?

Oct. 25, 2009 | 8:41 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

i voiced one, but like all thing im a complete failure and didnt finish it in time for this yr.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 8:12 AM killerrob says:

I was born in 1985 (you feel old now, don't you?)

Oct. 25, 2009 | 8:15 AM killerrob says:

Also, a Smurf......

Oct. 25, 2009 | 8:41 AM Daniel-M says:

i remember on nickelodeon when i was pretty young, they had a show called 'Are you afraid of the dark' and one episode was about a comic strip writer whose creation came to life. It was a jester but he would grab people by the throat and they would start salivating this blue goop stuff.
That Goosebumps episode with Adam West scared me shitless too...

Oct. 25, 2009 | 1:23 PM NickShadius says:

So you had a hell lot of fun in 1985, I see.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 1:25 PM Timmy says:

I was really excited, but then I realized that Tales From the Darkside =/= Tales from the Crypt.

That's the show that I grew up with.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 3:06 PM patchwork says:

smurf plus a cock joke and tank men bam new flash for yea

Oct. 25, 2009 | 5:08 PM Cyberdevil says:

Heh, may the memories RIP

Oct. 25, 2009 | 7:56 PM omegared says:

Once you go red you'll always want me instead ;)

Oct. 25, 2009 | 8:51 PM Zeppelin562 says:

Wolfman has nards.

Oct. 25, 2009 | 11:11 PM JakBaronKing says:

My favorite movie is the 1994 Frankenstein interpretation. Considered the most accurate to the book.

It still is a frightening experience on the ill will of humanity and their ambitions.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptVG0F 55vIU

Oct. 26, 2009 | 12:01 AM Kaptain-Karmel says:

This was my favorite part.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJ5SAp e-9mQ

Oct. 26, 2009 | 2:30 AM BiffTheTimid says:

Back in the day I saw an episode of Tales From the Dark Side where some young couple was staying at a mansion or some shit, and some monster dude shows up and chases them around. At one point the monster gets the drop on the guy, and grabs his head. He then proceeds to smoosh the dudes head into a gooey bloody pulp, and then he pulls his hands apart and there's a fucking trail of head goo between them. I threw up. Even typing this makes me feel sick.

Oct. 26, 2009 | 8:15 AM RYNOL says:

I'm waiting for Ching Chong Beautiful. Where is it?

Oct. 26, 2009 | 9:24 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

if you find it, let me know

Oct. 26, 2009 | 4:07 PM RYNOL says:

"if you find it, let me know"

Don't toy with me Mr. Bandelin. I know where you live! But seriously now... Is it getting close to finished?

Oct. 27, 2009 | 8:17 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

yes, we have a tentative release date which we will share SOON

Oct. 26, 2009 | 5:57 PM thepetergriffin says:

ooooohh i thought you meant smurf-dracula...haha that would be a great costume

Oct. 26, 2009 | 6:19 PM DannyJay says:

lol

Oct. 26, 2009 | 6:20 PM DannyJay says:

I see that show sometimes. when I start watching in the middle of it though, I assume its the 1980's Twilight Zone.

Oct. 27, 2009 | 8:17 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

i think darkside is more out to just scare you, twilight zone was more a mix of scares and wierd cautionary tales...

Oct. 26, 2009 | 7:31 PM Monny says:

I caught an episode of this when I was channel surfing the other day... It's pretty wild.

It's like the Twilight Zone with that eerie Unsolved Mysteries feel to it. I think it was the type of film they used that makes it so spooky. Another creepy one was Tales from the Crypt.

Don't feel bad about being a smurf. The Power Rangers hadn't been made yet, and I know that's your only reason for it.

Oct. 27, 2009 | 8:15 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

BOOOOOOO

Oct. 26, 2009 | 8:03 PM DrCritic says:

Snorks kick smurfs ass

Oct. 27, 2009 | 8:16 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

you did not just reference SNORKS

Oct. 27, 2009 | 12:15 AM ImpendingRiot says:

Man, Tales from the Darkside is so awesome. I wasn't young enough to see the originals air, but I did/do catch the ones on syndication, it's on SciFi/ScyFy(depending on how queer you want to be).

I agree, the theme is absolutely creepy and awesome at the same time. I like the episode where the famous impressionist has to communicate with the alien.

Oct. 27, 2009 | 5:19 PM SirWilliamIII says:

Gah! I don't care about your horrid child hood stories! I just want to play Ching Chong Beautiful dammit!

Oct. 27, 2009 | 5:22 PM Hoboweasel says:

Wow... that video was... OLD xD
Despite that it was sort of freaky in the end, though I didn't really get what kind of plot they were trying to develop. Kind of incoherent.

Still, that guy was being a douche... >_>

Oct. 27, 2009 | 5:46 PM FairlyObvious says:

I totally pwn your Smurf costume, my mom dressed me up as Pebbles from the Flintstones, complete with a dog bone tied up in my hair. I got the dog bone, my brother got the bat, so unfair.

Oct. 28, 2009 | 6:54 AM Rucklo says:

what a crappy wolfman. just standing there, takin' it in the nards.

Oct. 28, 2009 | 8:19 AM ForNoReason says:

Monster Squad is one of the best movies of all time.

Oct. 28, 2009 | 4:38 PM weaselfan says:

SMURF!?

Oct. 29, 2009 | 8:47 PM iphucyumum says:

well utah your right the only thing that would bring back vampires would be monster squad or in my mind count impaler whoops got chaught u in the moment

Oct. 29, 2009 | 9:53 PM Ani-x says:

favorite tails from the dark side was the one with the grampa who was to stubborn to die!!

oh man i wish i could watch that right about now.

any chnace you remember a old movie from the 80's about monsters and crap.
all i can really remember was they moved into a new house and only the youngest son knew something was up.

only part i can really remember was they was eating dinner, but the kid knew it was like monster slime or some shit, they wouldn't stop, so he just unzipped and pees all over it

"i can tighten my belt to hid my hunger pains, your mom cant"

man i got find that freaking movie...

Oct. 30, 2009 | 2:05 PM Leo3oproductions says:

yeah,its a good show but the twilight zone will kick it's ass any day of the week!

also,it is not scary it is more focused on mind fucks.

Oct. 30, 2009 | 4:33 PM Luis says:

hah, as a kid i had that rubber smurf mask that you are refering to as well.

Oct. 31, 2009 | 11:21 PM Neo-Fusion says:

Not a big deal, about the smurf. I was Mickey when I was 3.

Lol why does it seem fitting that you did many of the same things I did.

Nov. 1, 2009 | 4:00 PM sapphirefear says:

Hehe hehe... A smurf...

Nov. 1, 2009 | 6:57 PM ss4chepu says:

wait aminut......is that a smurf over there?
LETS KICK IM!!!!!!

Nov. 2, 2009 | 2:25 PM kiwasawa says:

thanx man now THAT pic is burned into my mind!

Nov. 2, 2009 | 11:25 PM newsmonster56 says:

Smurf: la la la la la sing the happy song la la la la la smurf the hole day long

Nov. 2, 2009 | 11:28 PM newsmonster56 says:

sorry dude i just got to sing that song.will the Smurf is a shithole am i right

Nov. 3, 2009 | 7:39 PM iLegoBlock says:

i had gust saw the epsode last week lol

Nov. 4, 2009 | 8:38 AM SweetSkater says:

This is the kind of show that destroys your innocent brain and forms nightmares nightly.

Nov. 5, 2009 | 5:19 PM Machete-stick says:

nice pic, even a kid can be crazy.

Nov. 8, 2009 | 6:26 AM AlmightyHans says:

i love a kids first instinct when a werewolf jumps up behind him. "Kick him in the nards"

Nov. 9, 2009 | 12:55 AM Catalyste says:

Dude I'm a year younger than you and I loved watching Tales from the Darkside. I hear you on that bridge and brook thing...freaked me the crap out...especially when they flipped it to negative colors....creepy. But what was worse was watching those Creepshow movies...I mean, that blob in the lake just scared the shit out of me...NO WAY!

Even though it's not scary, one total mind fuck that screwed me over was Naked Lunch....some pretty f'd up stuff to see when you're a 10 yr old.

Nov. 13, 2009 | 1:28 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

i agree

Nov. 9, 2009 | 7:03 PM gta123 says:

what faggit goes dressed up as a smurf

Nov. 13, 2009 | 1:27 AM JohnnyUtah responds:

you are so right

Nov. 13, 2009 | 9:45 AM Punisher says:

UTAH! gimme two

Nov. 15, 2009 | 3:10 AM spamasaurousrex says:

oh and We're no strangers to love,
You know the rules and so do I.
A full commitment's what I'm thinking of,
You wouldnt get this from any other guy.

I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling,
Gotta make you understand...

Never gonna give you up,
Never gonna let you down,
Never gonna run around and desert you.
Never gonna make you cry,
Never gonna say goodbye,
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.

We've known each other for so long
Your heart's been aching
But you're too shy to say it.
Inside we both know what's been going on,
We know the game and we're gonna play it.

Annnnnd if you ask me how I'm feeling,
Don't tell me you're too blind to see...

Never gonna give you up,
Never gonna let you down,
Never gonna run around and desert you.
Never gonna make you cry,
Never gonna say goodbye,
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.

Give you up. give you up.
Give you up, give you up.
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up.
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up.

We've known each other for so long
Your heart's been aching
But you're too shy to say it.
Inside we both know what's been going on,
We know the game and we're gonna play it.

I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling,
Gotta make you understand...

Never gonna give you up,
Never gonna let you down,
Never gonna run around and desert you.
Never gonna make you cry,
Never gonna say goodbye,
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.